WrestleMania XXX predictions

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LOS ANGELES, April 6, 2014 — After what seems like an eternity of build-up and anticipation, WrestleMania XXX is finally here. This year’s “Showcase of the Immortals” is today, Sunday, April 6 in New Orleans.

The main event is a World Heavyweight Championship match, which features former champion and current movie star Batista challenging the Undisputed Champion, Randy Orton. As touched on in the Gorilla Position’s previous columns, the WWE fans took it upon themselves to vocally disapprove of this possible match the moment at which it was even hinted.

Since losing his World Heavyweight Championship two years ago at WrestleMania 28 in a mere 18 seconds, fans have latched onto Daniel Bryan and have propelled him to superstar status. At the moment, he is the most popular WWE Superstar, bar none.

Fans were not happy with Bryan losing in such short fashion, and decided that only by loudly cheering and chanting Bryan’s one word catchphrases, “YES,” or, “NO,” would hopefully get the WWE front office to notice what they themselves saw in Bryan. Contrary to what wrestling fans believe, this is not the WWE front office’s first rodeo. They obviously know what they have in Daniel Bryan and have decided to “slow burn” his meteoric rise back into the Championship Level.


The WWE has not had a talent like Daniel Bryan captivate the audience like this since “Stone Cold” Steve Austin or The Rock. However, both Austin and the Rock won the crowd with their talents on the microphone along with their in-ring abilities. Daniel Bryan, while good on the microphone, has won over the crowd with his all world in-ring talents first. Bryan, who is not the tallest or most muscular talent on the roster, has a certain “everyman” quality to him onto which fans have latched.

Daniel Bryan faces insurmountable odds as he must face the 13-time World Champion, WWE Executive Vice President, and first ballot Hall of Famer, Triple H. At first, Triple H was just content with beating Daniel Bryan to prove to the fans and to Bryan that he had no business being anywhere near the World Title Hunt. Triple H loudly proclaimed he would gladly defeat Daniel Bryan, but then backpedaled, in typical “heel” fashion, saying that Bryan was not even in his league or universe. Triple H said he was an A+ wrestler, while Daniel Bryan was somewhere in the B or solid B+ range.

That’s when Daniel Bryan decided to take control of his destiny. He “took over RAW” and flooded the ring with his “fans” who loudly chanted “YES!” along with the arena crowd. The show was halted for all of a few minutes and Triple H proceeded to lose his composure and his temper because his precious show was not working like clockwork.

Daniel Bryan demanded a stipulation be added to their WrestleMania XXX match. If Bryan wins his match against Triple H, he will then be inserted into the Batista/Orton Main Event Championship match later in the evening, making it a Triple Threat Match. Since this is professional wrestling, of course Triple H agreed.

The championship will be saved for last, but first, the rest of the card and WrestleMania XXX Predictions. First up on the Pre-Show will be a Fatal 4-Way for the tag team championship. Jimmy and Jey, The Usos are the tag champs and they will defend against Cesaro and Jack Swagger of The Real Americans, Ryback/Curtis Axel, and Los Matadores. This match should be an entertaining pre-show match, but the tag belts will not be leaving the waists of the Uso twins.

The Divas title will be defended in a gimmicky 14-Diva single-fall match. The deck is stacked against current champion, AJ Lee, as the entire Divas roster will be gunning for her title. This match could go either way. AJ Lee could come out of this match with her title intact, or whoever the current Diva Flavor of the Month is could be crowned new champion. However, with that many Divas in the ring, there is a 100% chance of a WrestleMania Wardrobe Malfunction.

The 1st Annual “Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal” will pit 30 men in an over the top battle royale. The winner will get an Andre the Giant Trophy and a bag full of prestige. The 27 wrestlers announced for this match thus far are: Alberto del Rio, Big E, Big Show, Brad Maddox, Brodus Clay, Christian (who currently is suffering from a concussion and may not be involved), Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Darren Young, Dolph Ziggler, Fandango, Drew McIntyre, Goldust, The Great Khali, Heath Slater, Jinder Mahal, Justin Gabriel, Kofi Kingston, Mark Henry, The Miz, Rey Mysterio, Sheamus, R-Truth, Santino Marella, Sin Cara, Titus O’Neil, and Zack Ryder.

The three or four remaining slots will be used for debuting NXT rookies like Alexander Rusev or other mystery returning wrestlers. Prediction: When he first debuted in WCW in 1995, The Big Show was named The Giant, and was originally billed as “Andre the Giant’s son”. A heaping portion of Poetic Justice could be served up at WrestleMania XXX with a Big Show victory. Or Sheamus wins.

Freshly turned good guys The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns) take on Kane and the New Age Outlaws (Billy Gunn and The Road Dogg). Prediction: The trio of the young rising superstars defeats the trio of Triple H’s buddies, who have a combined age of 140, in an extremely entertaining match.

Next up is a singles match featuring the maniacal cult-like leader Bray Wyatt versus “this generation’s Hulk Hogan”, John Cena. The Wyatt Family set their crazed eyes onto John Cena recently and hopefully this match will be used to further cement the rising star that is Bray Wyatt. The third generation superstar will be flanked by his obedient devotees, Luke Harper and Erick Rowan and they will try to distract John Cena during the match. This match will be hard hitting affair leaving both men battered and bruised.

Prediction: This match is a possible “star maker” match for Bray Wyatt, much like his victory over Daniel Bryan at this year’s Royal Rumble. Wyatt wins via nefarious means either by a pinfall or disqualification. Though, logic is not always present in the WWE, as Cena morphs into “Super Cena”, overcomes the three on one odds stacked against him, and Cena wins cleanly over the young Wyatt.

The Undertaker puts his WrestleMania Streak, currently 21-0 against “The Beast Incarnate” Brock Lesnar in the next match. These two guys hate each other and this will be an old fashioned slug fest. This may not be the longest match of the night, but this will certainly have some of the most thunderous punches and more realistic offensive moves. Brock Lesnar is a former UFC Champion and The Undertaker fashions himself as a skilled submission wrestler in his own right. The match will be entertaining to watch, but the ending is a tad anticlimactic.

Prediction: Sorry Brock, but the prediction is that there is no way The Undertaker leaves WrestleMania with anything less than a pinfall or submission victory. Maybe Lesnar gets his crowd heat back by defeating or injuring The Undertaker the next night on RAW, which would allow Undertaker to leave for his yearly extended vacation.

The final two matches are so intertwined, storyline wise, that by the end of the night, they may end up fusing together to make one match. Daniel Bryan faces Triple H, and the winner becomes the third wheel of the Randy Orton/Batista WWE World Heavyweight Championship match.

As mentioned above, the fans want Daniel Bryan to leave WrestleMania the new champion after having vanquished any and all obstacles in his path. It is the WWE’s job to make these obstacles insurmountable so that the audience has more than a shred of doubt that Bryan could succeed. This is where it will get tricky.

If Daniel Bryan somehow defeats Triple H, would Triple H or his wife, Stephanie McMahon use their ownership power to somehow insert Triple H into the title match, thus making it a Fatal Four-Way? Concurrently, if Triple H defeats Daniel Bryan in a reprehensible manner, would an authority figure arrive on the scene and rule that the match should restart or that both men will now be in the title match?

The chess pieces are on the board and certain parties will be in attendance in New Orleans. Former authority figures like Stone Cold Steve Austin and Shane McMahon have been confirmed to be in attendance. In the words of WWE owner, Vince McMahon, “Anything can happen in the WWE!”

That certainly does not solve the title match conundrum. While Randy Orton could leave WrestleMania with his title around his waist, it is a very marginal percentage. Batista has a higher percentage to leave as champion because he would look great with the WWE title belt on his shoulder as he walks the red carpet for premiere of the Marvel Comics summer blockbuster, The Guardians of the Galaxy. However, that film does not come out until August 1, so there could be a post-WrestleMania title rematch for Batista to accessorize his red carpet outfit with a gold belt.

The favorite to win the match and the title is Daniel Bryan. His title win should be the catharsis of every torment and pain that not only Bryan, but the crowd as well, have experienced during these past grueling eight months.

An interesting X-factor in all of this goes by the name of CM Punk. He has not been seen on WWE television since January’s Royal Rumble. On the next night, he did not appear on the January 27 episode of RAW and reports started flooding in that he and WWE Management had a disagreement and that Punk decided to go home. The entire story has never been released as to why Punk walked out and the internet has been flooded with rumors and hearsay ever since.

The WWE has dubbed this timeline of their product, “The Reality Era”. Like most of the world, WWE is currently enamored with social media like Twitter and Facebook to expand their brand. The problem with social media and the internet is that surprise guests and potential future wrestling storylines have the high probability of getting spoiled. Wrestling news and rumors spread like wildfire over the internet. There is no element of surprise in the modern era of professional wrestling anymore. The fans know about what is going to happen before it makes it on television.

What if the WWE decided to create a wrestling angle that was so steeped in realism that it could deceive their knowledgeable fans? In reality, CM Punk’s body was in need of a break from the WWE’s production schedule. Could they have concocted a plan to write Punk out of storylines, while at the same time getting him much needed rest for four months? Vince McMahon’s only comments on the situation were that Punk was on a “sabbatical” and the WWE rarely if ever mentioned CM Punk’s name on their televised shows. Why would the WWE go to such lengths to do something like this? Therein lies the rub.

One of the most famous heel turns in all of professional wrestling happened in 1996 at WCW’s Bash at the Beach. The Outsiders, Scott Hall and Kevin Nash, posing as their WWE characters, claimed they arrived to “invade” WCW. They claimed they had a mystery third member and challenged any of WCW’s three members to a match. WCW’s Sting, Lex Luger, and the Macho Man Randy Savage answered the challenge. At the Bash at the Beach, without their mystery partner, Hall and Nash fought the three WCW wrestlers.

During the match, Lex Luger was knocked out and taken to the back for medical attention, thus now making the match a two on two. When all men were down on the mat, Hulk Hogan walked down the aisle towards the ring. The crowd cheered for Hogan and believed he was there to save the day for WCW against these invaders. When he stepped in the ring, Hall and Nash fled and then Hogan dropped several leg drops on the fallen Randy Savage and revealed himself to be the mystery third member. A legend was torn down and a new legend, Hollywood Hogan, was born on that night.

Picture Daniel Bryan about to overcome the longest of odds by defeating two or three men in the main event. Triple H seeing his worst nightmare happening before his eyes. He decides that enough is enough and goes for his weapon of choice, the sledgehammer to neutralize Bryan’s chance at championship gold. When from the crowd, a hooded figure jumps over the barrier, stops Triple H from attacking Daniel Bryan, and then hits Daniel Bryan with the weapon himself. The hooded man then reveals himself to be CM Punk, and the crowd boos the once fan favorite out of the building. Batista covers the fallen Bryan, Triple H is ecstatic, CM Punk has sold out, and a new season of the WWE starts the next night on RAW. One hell of a cliffhanger.

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