MILLINOCKET, Maine, December 28, 2014 – While on the First Family’s Hawaiian Holiday vacation, President Obama spent his morning standing close to the lava flow of Kīlauea, making chip shots into the molten flow.
A favored Hawaiian past time, the President likes to watch as the cover on the golf ball pops open, guts of the ball spilling out like spaghetti; the whole mass instantly melted at 895 degrees Fahrenheit.
“What a great vacation!” he said to the attending Press Corp. “Beats the hell out of listening to Boehner or McConnell drone on with s**t I don’t care about. It’s 10 am, Michelle is still in bed, the girls are on the beach, and all is right with the world,” he declared with his signature grin.
“OK, boys, I’m done fryin’ golf balls,” as he climbed into the Presidential SUV. “Now, let’s get to the golf course!”
Unconfirmed reports are that Michelle Obama stirred and slowly sat up in bed this morning, ordering room service. Non-existent tapes of that conversation are transcribed below.
“This is the Presidential Suite. I want a four-egg omelet with sausage, Belgian waffles, coffee and orange juice. And can you make hash browns like the Waffle House? Good. I want ‘em scattered, smothered and covered.”
The room service waiter reported overhearing Mrs. Obama say “I just might stay a couple more weeks and let Barry fly back on his own and they can just send that giant plane back for me.”
She then instructed the waiter to serve her in bed.
When asked if there were any plans for the rest of the year the President said that no more Executive Orders are forthcoming… for 2014.
Disclaimer: The preceding is totally bogus. But if recent events in the media are any indication, bogus or bonafide doesn’t make much difference to the media anymore.
As online publishers look for the next great story, and can’t find one, it seems more and more are “just making it up.” After all, readership is what counts, right? Forget truth or accuracy.
From matters of national policy to magazine fluff, people are taking great liberties with their information.
At what point do we draw the line? Fiction used to be a genre of literature, now fiction has become the new journalism.
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