INDIANAPOLIS, November 4, 2015 — Here it is, the day after election day, and already people are griping about vote manipulation. Among the common gripes are complaints about early voting, one of the dumbest ideas ever put forth by manipulative, exploitative party bosses to test their grassroots organizations.
Early voting, with timeframes being ever expanded to the point where some dead peoples’ votes legitimately get counted on election day, is a breeding ground for all sorts of mischief.
Among the obvious problems of early voting are the practice of inciting groups of impressionable college kids and taking them immediately in buses to vote; the illegal but fairly common collection of absentee ballots from elders’ mailboxes, marking them and sending them in; massaging early turnout in order to avoid the fallout of a breaking scandal before election day; and myriad others. The internet is full of real-world examples along with hypotheticals.
Even with early voting, voter turnout is light, sometimes limited to almost only those dead people the parties line up ahead of time.
Cheer up, America! We are not helpless.
What we need — and it will solve the problem of voter turnout, as well — is late voting. For a period of time equal to the period of early voting, we need to allow late voters to cast ballots. Think; all the jerks who stayed home because they thought their candidate was going to win would get off their couches and send in ballots. All the people who didn’t vote, but thought their candidate won, would be forced to run out to ensure the victory. Huge turnout, and endless recounts: drama, with more people in the game.
No one should be against this; it’s the perfect second chance. People born since the 1970s have all been raised on a steady diet of do-overs, anyway; it’s natural to more than half the voters. Since there would be a much larger turnout, those who think that “Vote, no matter what!” is a good idea should be pleased.
Couch potatoes could wait for the election to see which side they favored, and would be forced to voice their opinions. Even previously-overlooked dead people could cast ballots in agreeable voting districts.
Of course, late voting might help Republicans, who are terrible at organizing early voters. But there are plenty of stay-at-home Democrats, too.
Lots of people like to back a winner; late voting would increase their chances of doing exactly that.
Thousands of others just don’t vote, but sit around after elections, griping, “No, I didn’t vote, but I sure am sick of how ‘they’ keep letting the other guys win!” We read their grumbles on blogs.
The states with the earliest voting now will also have the latest voting. That’s only fair. The reasons for late voting are at least as good as those for early voting, and looking at the “provisional results” is a lot more accurate than depending on polling data to pick one’s candidate.
So, no excuses, people! Vote, and know that your vote will make a difference, because you’ll see the difference!