Jan 5th: Weddings relocated, Reid wrecks, Congress does the “redux”

Any hope of change is once again dashed on the lava rocks of Hawaii as the business New Year begins and its already a travesty


MILLINOCKET, Maine, January 5, 2015 – The Old Year ended with President Obama disrupting a wedding that got in the way of his golf game. Natalie Heimel and Edward Mallue Jr., were to be married at the 16th tee of Kaneohe Klipper Golf Course, Marine Corps Base Hawaii, on December 28.

Problem was, the President was going to be on the course the same day.

The President won the scheduling conflict and Natalie and Edward were forced to move their ceremony.

Luckily a nice place overlooking the 16th green was found for them and they were able to go ahead with their Sunday nuptials. The President called the wedding party and apologized.

Henry Kissinger - Michael Moore

The New Year started with Harry Reid doing a pretty good Gerald Ford impression.

A statement issued by his office said, “A piece of equipment Senator Reid was using to exercise broke, causing him to fall and break a number of ribs and bones in his face.”


In spite of his injuries, Senator Reid plans to be back on Capitol Hill this week, where he and his fellow invertebrates in Congress will continue with whatever it is they do there.

Incoming Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and his Republican cronies will talk a big game about blocking Obama’s policies. In truth, they have already tied their own hands by helping to pass the so-called “Cromnibus” bill which funds most of the President’s pet projects for at least the next 9 months.

But why quibble? Let’s pretend that things will be different this year, and as Henry Kissinger might say, “Progress will be made.”

By the way, have you seen Hefty Henry lately? He has really bulked up since the Nixon good old days. He and Michael Moore must eat in the same circles.

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Pithanthropy the Human Conditioner by Jim Bozeman

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