SATIRE: Dolezal, Jenner, facts and feelings
SAN DIEGO, June 16, 2015 —One day after resigning as president of the NAACP’s Spokane, Wash., branch, Rachel Dolezal finally decided to explain her claim to be black, a claim recently challenged by white biological parents. Her explanation was as clear as mud.
In an interview on “The Today Show” with Matt Lauer, Dolezal insisted she had not been lying.
“I do take exception to that because it’s a little more complex than me identifying as black or answering a question of, are you black or white?”
Earlier, when the story first broke, Dolezal was asked by the Spokane Review to clarify her position. She said “That question is not as easy as it seems… There’s a lot of complexities … and I don’t know that everyone would understand that.”
Many are drawing a comparison between Dolezal and Bruce Jenner in the wake of his (her) recent decision to undergo “gender reassignment.”
But this goes light years beyond Jenner. These days, if a middle school boy simply feels like a girl, he’s allowed to use the girl’s locker room. There need be no pending sex-change operation.
Obviously, America has reached a new level of sophistication, so prepare yourself, for this will not stop with gender identification or race identification. We have opened up Pandora’s box, and all kinds of fun toys are going to pop out of it.
Do you want to number yourself among those who understand the complexities and subtle nuances of life, or do you wish to remain some back-woods bumpkin who is dumb enough to actually trust his eyes?
To help you stay ahead of the game, here are some future scenarios to be on the lookout for.
1) Be careful the next time a waitress messes up your order because chances are, you only think she messed up. True, you may have ordered a hamburger and she may have brought you a watercress sandwich, but did it ever occur to you that she feels like a waitress who gets people’s orders correct? If that is the way she feels, who are you to judge?
2) During the next summer Olympics, be prepared: One of the silver medal gymnasts might feel like a gold medal winner. Sportscasters who report otherwise will be showing their own shortsightedness.
3) The next time somebody is arrested for holding up a grocery store, the perpetrator might testify in court that in his heart he does not feel like a criminal. Any jury who refuses to acquit him based upon that testimony is showing horrible insensitivity.
4) And while we’re on the subject of crime…Maybe a captured Islamic terrorist feels he is in reality a Jewish rabbi and that his “act of terror” was merely an officiation of a special shabbat service.
5) Last but not least: When a college student in class flunks a test, he would be well advised to promptly inform the instructor that he feels he deserved an A. In fact, he feels this in his heart with every fiber of his being! Not only does he feel that he deserved an A but upon staring at the letter scribbled on top of the test in red ink, the student is quite certain that he actually sees an A!
NOTE: This last one has the best chance of garnering a positive response. After all, he will not be challenging a mere simpleton, but rather a sophisticated college professor who understands the complexities of life. There are many ideas today that only one with a graduate school education can grasp.
This is Bob Siegel, making the obvious, obvious.
Bob Siegel is a weekend radio talk show host on KCBQ and a columnist. Details of his show can be found at www.bobsiegel.net