Random thoughts about the 2015 Grammy Awards

No one really cares about who took home Grammys. We care about the WTH moments.

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Summing up the Grammys: Prince, your look says it all. Photo: Courtesy CBS
Summing up the Grammys: Prince, your look says it all. Photo: Courtesy CBS

SAN DIEGO, February 8, 2015 – You can read who won the 2015 Grammy Awards Sunday night anywhere. Other than the people who won, and the nominees who didn’t, along perhaps with the people they thanked, no one will remember by Monday. It won’t change a fan’s mind, and it won’t sell any more downloads.

Here’s what we really care about: The WTH Moments.

The Grammys red carpet is the most fun of the entire awards season, because we get treated to the largest number of fashion train wrecks. The Oscars used to give us a Cher every so often, but now the stars mainly play it safe. Yawn. Different story at the Grammys.

Didn’t Madonna look like Madeline Kahn from the movie “Blazing Saddles?”

Madonna channels her inner Lili Von Shtupp at the Grammys.
Madonna channels her inner Lili Von Shtupp at the Grammys.

Rihanna is normally a fashion risk taker in all the right ways. She looked like a bad pink birthday cake from Baskin Robbins.

Someone needs to put Pharrell and AC/DC’s Angus Young together on stage in their schoolboy shorts.

Kanye West’s performance was so boring, it didn’t matter than he was auto-tuned more than Britney Spears on her worst day.

Half the audience thought “Tom Jones, you’re a stud!” and the other half thought, “This old guy went overboard on the spray tan.”

Some people think Ed Sheeran looks like Prince Harry. He looks more like Bilbo Baggins.

We get it. Taylor Swift is a really, really, really awkward dancer. Enough already, can we focus the cameras elsewhere during the show? Perhaps on the stage?

We get it already, Taylor Swift is a dorky fangirl when she isn't on stage. Photo: Courtesy CBS.
We get it already, Taylor Swift is a dorky fangirl when she isn’t on stage. Photo: Courtesy CBS.

Adam Levine is improbably hot. As in hawt. If you don’t get it, I can’t explain it to you. Yes, yes, yes.

Annie Lennox showed everyone How It Is Done. True talent needs no frills to thrill. Hozier held his own with Lennox, no easy feat. Performance of the night hands down.

Where was Grammy nominee Chris Brown during the presentation about domestic violence featuring President Obama, domestic violence survivor Brooke Axtell, and Katy Perry? Restroom break, hmm? Don’t you know everyone in the audience was looking around for him during this segment.

Which Katy Perry hairstyle was the wig? The purple bob on the red carpet, or the black sleek ponytail during her performance? (Betting on the pony).

Stevie Wonder only had 30 seconds on stage and didn’t say a word, but he made more of an impression during the Grammys than two-thirds of the performers.

You can't fake cool: Stevie Wonder with Usher. Photo: Courtesy CBS
You can’t fake cool: Stevie Wonder with Usher. Photo: Courtesy CBS

Ballad after ballad after ballad. My blood sugar couldn’t take any more, I had to drink a Mountain Dew about 10:30 p.m.

That guitar player backing up Rihanna and Kanye West used to play in a band of his own back in the day, so I hear.

Did we just go over an hour without presenting a single award on the air? Oh yes, we did. Way over. The producers could only find room to present 13 of the 83 categories on the air in three hours. Now we know why.

Biggest applause of the night: when Prince walked out on stage to present “Album of the Year.” Maybe it was for Prince and his orange vinyl bell bottom pants, maybe it was because we finally got to see someone get an award on an actual awards show. It was Beck. Kanye nearly pulled a Taylor Swift on him. This year, the show was so boring it would have been welcome.

What’s the point of having someone face the back wall and sing on a live show? Can we all stop indulging Sia, please?

Stevie Wonder and Jamie Foxx come back three hours and eight minutes into the show, and provide a fun moment (finally) with the Braille award envelope. Winner Sam Smith thanks the man who broke his heart for inspiring an album that won him four Grammys. Success is the best revenge, Sam.

Annie Lennox (right) stole the show performing "I Put A Spell On You" by Screamin' Jay Hawkins alongside Irish singer Hozier. Photo: Courtesy CBS
Annie Lennox (right) stole the show performing “I Put A Spell On You” by Screamin’ Jay Hawkins alongside Irish singer Hozier. Photo: Courtesy CBS

Jennifer Hudson had an even more thankless assignment than Dave Grohl. We got Kanye performing twice instead of hearing from either of these talented people.

What, it’s over and I have to haul my backside to bed already? It’s only 11:40 p.m.

What the Grammys really needed were some dancing sharks on stage. Could we keep this in mind for 2016?

Gayle Lynn Falkenthal, APR, is President/Owner of the Falcon Valley Group in San Diego, California. She is also a serious boxing fan covering the Sweet Science for Communities. Read more Media Migraine in Communities Digital News. Follow Gayle on Facebook and on Twitter @PRProSanDiego. Gayle can be reached via Google +

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