“New Belgian Coin Really Irritates France”: A poem to amuse

Slyly circumventing the rules, those très crafty Belgians create a new coin expressly to torque off the French.

Belgian 2.5 euro coin.
New Belgian 2.5 euro coin commemorating Napoleon's defeat in the Battle of Waterlooo. (Via Wikipedia)

New Belgian Coin Really Irritates France

− A poem Inspired by a story in the New York Times:

Andrieux: Battle of Waterloo. (Via Wikipedia)
Andrieux: Battle of Waterloo. (Via Wikipedia)

“After it objected to a decision in March by Belgium to introduce a new 2 euro coin to commemorate the 200th anniversary of Napoleon’s defeat at Waterloo, the Belgians retreated, scrapping 180,000 coins they had already minted.

“But victory for France is proving elusive.

“This week, Belgium decided to circumvent French resistance by invoking a little-known European Union rule that allows countries to issue euro coins of their choice, provided they are in an irregular denomination.

“That led to the unveiling of a €2.50 coin — a first in Belgium — and 70,000 of them have now been minted.”

David: Portrait of Napoleon.
David: Portrait of Napoleon. (Via Wikipedia)

One day this guy breezes into French bar, and asks for a Waterloo.
The barkeep has served liquor for thirty years, but doesn’t know what he should do.
The guy says “You make it with sherry and rum, and shake it with ice like frappé;
and when it is creamy and foamy enough, you take it and toss it away!”

The same guy goes into a hair styling place – a “Waterloo” is his request.
The barber is puzzled and so the guy says, “Split every hair with lots of zest!”
He next orders dinner and asks for a wine of Waterloo vintage, tout de suite.
The waiter is nonplussed and so the guy says “It’s made using only da feet!”

At last this connard visits Manuel Valls, the Premier of all splendide France,
and chirps to him “Way back at Waterloo, dude, French soldiers did not stand a chance.”
The Premier invited this plain-spoken man to sample the best French cuisine –
In prison, where I am most sad to report, he lost his head by guillotine.

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