WASHINGTON, August 21, 2015 – The New York Times reports there’s trouble brewing for maple syrup producers up in Quebec Province, Canada. It seems that the provincial government is cracking down on bootleg syrup.
And I quote:
“While many Americans associate Vermont with maple syrup, Quebec is its epicenter. The province’s trees produce more than 70 percent of the world’s supply and fills the majority of the United States’ needs. The Federation of Quebec Maple Syrup Producers, in turn, has used that dominance to restrict supply and control prices of the pancake topping.
It is effectively a cartel, approved by the provincial government and backed by the law. In 1990, the federation became the only wholesale seller of the province’s production, and in 2004, it gained the power to decide who gets to make maple syrup and how much.”
In other words, if you ain’t in the loop your maple syrup is confiscated and destroyed, and you are fined up to 60-thousand Loonies for defying the maple syrup cartel.
As if OPEC isn’t bad enough, now we have a maple syrup cartel, or MOPEC, dictating prices to us.
It’s enough to make a patriot throw his or her hotcakes into Boston Harbor.
Terrorism against MOPEC may already be afoot, as this sinister headline from the Keene, New Hampshire, Sentinel Source newspaper intimates: “Maple syrup leak brings traffic delays at Keene roundabout.”
The story runs like this:
“About 75 gallons of syrup is believed to have leaked from the truck, according to a tweet from Southwestern N.H. District Fire Mutual Aid. The freight truck was carrying 220 gallons, according to the driver, who declined to identify himself.”
Sounds suspicious as hell to me . . .
Better get Homeland Security on the case. Or, better yet, call in Agent Gibbs and his crack team from NCIS. They ALWAYS catch the culprit.
Of course, the whole thing may be a dastardly plot against the presidential campaign of Bernie Sanders.
The Week blog reports that the “Paloma Cocktail”, in honor of Vermonter Sanders, is making barflies sit up and take bleary notice.
The recipe calls for a robust amount of maple syrup:
The Bernie Paloma
0.5 oz. Vermont maple syrup
0.5 oz. fresh lime juice
2 oz. fresh grapefruit juice
2 oz. silver tequila
Garnish: sea salt, lime juice, water and Sucro, emulsified with a hand blender.
But if maple syrup is priced out of the reach of the average tippler, Sanders may have to rely on totally sober voters to usher him into the White House.
There are wheels within wheels here . . .
…Oh Canada, how sweet thou are…
The Maple Syrup Cartel of Québec is a disgrace:
They jack up prices like it was a sweetener arms race.
I hope those independent men and gals of sugar bush
send that Cartel packing to the wilds of Hindu Kush!