‘Those Damned Pop-ups!’ A poetic maledictory

‘Those Damned Pop-ups!’ A poetic maledictory

In which our resident poet decries the continuing plague of Internet ads that pop-up blockers will not block. All the world's an ad. Is there no decency?

Pop-up ad software.
Want even more pop ups? Screen shot of a program promising to make annoying Internet users even easier.

Those Damned Pop-ups!

I open up a website to review the latest news:
A pop-up grabs the screen, and I’m about to blow a fuse.
Whether in the online LA Times or Portland’s old Tribune,
It blocks me from the story with an ad inopportune.

Savagely I click upon the “X” that marks the spot
Wherin I can delete it – but delete it I cannot!
It runs its course like Destiny. Like Destiny it fails
To take into account my cussing and heart-broken wails.

To you who create pop-ups and all other bells and whistles
That wreck my viewing pleasure – may you strangle on some thistles!
I hope that when your loved ones come to visit your cold tomb
They’re blocked by walls of pop-ups all in ruddy, noisy bloom.

(Now just an afterthought: I’m sure that when you read this piece
On any website, you will first get lots of pop-up fleece.
That’s why a real book or magazine is such a blessing –
You get right to the written word without the window dressing!)

−March 24, 2015

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Terry Ponick
Biographical Note: Dateline Award-winning music and theater critic for The Connection Newspapers and the Reston-Fairfax Times, Terry was the music critic for the Washington Times print edition (1994-2010) and online Communities (2010-2014). Since 2014, he has been the Business and Entertainment Editor for Communities Digital News (CDN). A former stockbroker and a writer and editor with many interests, he served as editor under contract from the White House Office of Science and Technology Policy (OSTP) and continues to write on science and business topics. He is a graduate of Georgetown University (BA, MA) and the University of South Carolina where he was awarded a Ph.D. in English and American Literature and co-founded one of the earliest Writing Labs in the country. Twitter: @terryp17